I’m prone to anxiety. I overthink, I react too quickly, I get upset. And then, I can get really upset and anxious.
I can’t control it because my thoughts get overwhelming. It’s a like a reactor that only goes in one direction. Once I start, I spiral. And when I do, a panic attack can last anywhere between 30 minutes to 7 hours.
It’s like I described in one of my spoken word poems. Here is just a quick description of what it feels like to me.
“ When your entire being opens into the darkness and loops about unending
when every flicker of light is seen with malice and hatred,
when every piece of your worth is measured against the white wall,
when your intelligence and happiness give up on you
That is the beginning of an anxiety attack.
When your worlds collapse onto each other, repeatedly
When you are burning yourself to find your light,
When your mirror stops seeing you for a long, long time
When every reason is made an excuse
That is the duration of your anxiety attack.”
To sum it up as light-heartedly as I can – it’s not fun. It’s obvious then that I need ways to cope with it. One way for me is by reading.
I read as much as I can. It’s still not enough, but it’s a start.
And it was while I was reading to heal myself, I realized maybe someone else can benefit from my reading list. I’ve limited it to 5 books so that it doesn’t get overwhelming.
Here goes –
- Presence – Amy Cuddy
- The Big Red Book of Rumi – Coleman Barks
- Flow – Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi
- The Secret – Rhonda Byrne
- The Power of Now – Eckhart Tolle
I’ve included the Goodreads excerpts of the books below, in case you want to know a little about them.